I Love You, Too!

Last week, Elyse started coming up to me, giving me a hug, and saying, "I love you, too."  At first, I just smiled and said, "Ahh, thank you."  Now, she has figured out that we like it, and she does it a few dozen times a day.  At first I thought it was cute because she was saying it backwards (instead of waiting for someone else to say, "I love you" for her to reply, "I love you, too.").  This morning when she said it to me, I realized something.  By adding the simple word "too", in a way, Elyse is telling me she loves me without any expectations.  She loves me without me saying it first. 

Wouldn't our society be a lot less dysfunctional if we took on this approach to loving people?  If we would try to love people without a list of expectations and requirements, our relationships would probably be a lot healthier.  We have a perfect example of this in the Bible.  God loves us before we even have the capacity to love him back.  We can come to him with all our imperfections and problems and he simply says, "I love you, too."  Most people have at least heard of John 3:16, but it really does sum up this perfect love.  "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." 

As we enter this "month of love", I hope we'll all take a moment to say to someone (maybe even someone who has never said it to us), "I LOVE YOU, TOO!"

Be Still...

2010...what a year it has been!  As we approach 2011, I am in awe of all the wonderful gifts God has given us this past year.  Some of the gifts were not wrapped in the prettiest of paper (more like hospital gowns), but in the end, we are so grateful!  I am happy to report that as we ring in the new year, Kris' hip is feeling much better (he even started back at the gym last week!!), Elyse's has had no signs of recurrence of her lymph node infection, and, as you know, Kieran's kidney reflux is a thing of the past!  Praise God! 

I've decided to invite a guest writer for this final blog of the year.  As I was looking through some old notebooks, I came across a devotional that Kris had written a few years ago for our church's Christmas devotional book.  I thought it was very appropriate as we wind down the holiday season and gear up for the new year

Be still and know that I am God.  Psalm 46:10

As the father of a two year old, I wish I knew what it meant to be still and know that He is God.  Actually, there are times that I wish my two year old knew what it meant to be still!  I find it difficult to "be still".  This is probably one of the Biblical concepts that I struggle with the most.  Our culture encourages instant messaging, 24 hour shopping, and news around the clock.  It is hard to find time just to be still.

During this time of the year, it is very easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of the holidays.  From the busyness of shopping for gifts to getting together with family and friends, this is a busy time of year.  Don't get me wrong, all these things are great, but I wish I could learn what it means to "be still". 

I am reminded of Mary.  She had quite a lot of busyness in her life.  She had been visited by an angel who told her that she was going to give birth to the son of God.  Then shepherds came and told her about more angels that had appeared to them.  That was a lot of activity!  All of the people who heard about it were amazed.  It was exciting!  But the scriptures tell us that "Mary treasured all of these things and pondered them in her heart."  Here is someone who could have easily gotten caught up in the excitement of her life, but instead she took it all in and pondered upon those things in her heart.  I think that if I were to figure out how to "be still" it might look something like that.  So, the next time your life starts to get to busy, "Be Still". 

God bless and happy 2011!

Mommy, I'm all better!

Those were the magical words that I heard today from my son! As many of you know, both Kieran and Elyse were born with something called vesticoureteral reflux or kidney reflux (for us non medical people). Kieran was diagnosed when he was a year and half after having a UTI. Every year they have to be tested to see if the reflux has improved or gotten worse. For 2 years in a row, Kieran's "level" decreased and we had high hopes that he would grow out of it (some children do). Unfortunately, at our last check-up, Kieran's level had gone up and the reflux was now present on both sides. After meeting with a pediatric urologist, we decided to try a procedure which involved putting implants on both sides of his bladder to try to correct the reflux. The other options was surgery which we wanted to avoid if possible. In October, Kieran had the outpatient procedure. The doctor told us we had to wait 2 months to find out if the procedure was a success.

Today was that two month appointment so Kieran had to go to the hospital to have another VCUG (which is not a pleasant procedure...especially for a little one). Kris took him this time and I went to a friend's house to pray and keep my mind occupied. At 2:30, Kieran called me and told me that he was all better and the doctor said he was fine. The tests showed that his reflux was gone, his kidneys were fine, and we never have to go back to that doctor again! Of course, I broke down in tears. I think Kieran was a little confused by my response. He'll understand one day!

Time...

In attempts to do a better job at keeping up with this blog, I've decided to look for a weekly (at least) lesson that my kids are teaching me. This week I've learned a lot about time. I read recently (can't remember where) that God created time and He created enough of it. I seem to forget that small fact! I wrote in a recent blog about investing our time wisely, and this week, I realized how important it is to invest our time in our kids!

This morning, Kieran woke up hungry and so we were downstairs at 6:45 am to make breakfast. Kieran decided he wanted Mickey Mouse pancakes. As I was carefully pouring the mouse-shaped cake, I had a flashback to my childhood. I loved pancakes as a child as long as they weren't too brown! My mom was the queen of shaped pancakes. She would write our names and make shapes depending on the holiday. Now that I look back, I realize that she spoiled us (thanks, mama). However, she didn't spoil us with expensive toys or by getting us anything we wanted in the store. She spoiled us with her time. I'm pretty sure a day was still 24 hours (even 30 years ago), and I'm sure my mom had a lot of housework that needed to be done, but I don't ever remember her putting us off.

As we enter this week of Thanksgiving, I am so thankful for my children and the time that God has given me to spend with them. I have to remind myself that these days of Mickey Mouse pancakes will not last long.

Children are a gift from the Lord. ~Psalm 127:3

Life's Little Lessons: Rain, Stop!

Yesterday was a very rainy day! Don't get me wrong. I was glad to see the rain, but I don't like going out in it with the kids. On our way to church for my mom's group, Elyse looked out the window, held up her hand and yelled, "Rain, stop!" Guess what happened? Nothing! Surprisingly, the rain did not listen to her! At first I thought, how typical of a 2 year old to think she has control over everything, including the weather. Then I realized that I'm not so different. I often fool myself into thinking I have control over situations in my life. In reality, I know that only God can control the wind and the rain (and sicknesses and job security and politics...). Even though I try to take control (on a daily basis), I am actually really thankful that I have a God who is bigger than me and bigger than the storms that rage through my life sometimes. I know that if I put my trust in Him, He will either calm the storm or calm me in the midst of it.

Then he got into the boat and his disciples followed him. Suddenly, a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping. The disciples went and woke him, saying, "Lord, save us! We're going to drown!"

He replied, "You of little faith. Why are you so afraid?" Then he got up and rebuked the wind and the waves, and it was completely calm.

The men were amazed and asked, "What kind of man is this? Even the winds and waves obey him. ~Matthew 8:23-27 (NIV)

Investments

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

A couple of months ago, someone's facebook status read, "If you want to see me or my family, stop by anytime. If you want to see me and my clean house, please call ahead and make an appointment!" At first I laughed, but then I realized how true that was for me. I have often not invited someone over because of the state of my house. When he had our house on the market this summer, I had to keep it spotless all the time. I was constantly cleaning, picking up toys, and vacuuming every piece of dirt that made it in the door. I enjoyed having a spotless house and was very proud when people came over, but I was exhausted all the time. I was investing a lot of time and energy into this house. However, I still didn't invite people over often because now I wanted to keep it clean!

Earlier this summer, we had a new Korean family move in next door to us. We introduced ourselves quickly one day, but never seemed to find the time to really get to know them. A couple of months later, we ran into them at Target and stopped to talk to them. During the conversation, I invited the wife to stop by anytime and I'd be happy to help her practice her English. Of course, you know how invitations like that go; we make them all the time. "Please, stop by anytime....call me if you need anything...we'll have to get together sometime." Deep down, the offers are genuine, but we seldom expect people to follow up on them. The very next day, however, my doorbell rang and there was my neighbor holding 2 bags with the biggest honeydew melons I've ever seen.

My first reaction was surprise. My second reaction was, oh no, my house is a mess. That morning, my kids and I had made blueberry pancakes and the evidence of that was still all over the kitchen! Nonetheless, I invited her in and we had a great visit. During the visit, she asked for some water (okay, so I'm not the best hostess) and then followed me to the kitchen. When we walked in, I immediately apologized for the mess. My neighbor looked at me and said that she was happy to see my messy kitchen. She said that in Korea people are not as concerned about house appearances as we are here. She said that she and her husband noticed that soon after they arrived. Now, she doesn't like having people over to her house because she is embarrassed about how it looks. Wow!

Since that nice visit, we've had our neighbors over for dinner and we've been to their house. Our kids go back and forth and play together. Sometimes our houses are clean; sometimes they aren't! Through this experience, I've decided to take a hard look at what I invest my time in. I still spend a lot of time cleaning the house, doing laundry, and making sure my family doesn't live in filth (ha ha). However, I now have a better understanding of how important it is to invest in our relationships.

I'm reading a book by Max Lucado called, Outlive Your Life. I found this quote that really made me stop and think:

If we wait until everything is perfect, we'll never issue an invitation. Remember this: what is common to you is a banquet to someone else. You think your house is small, but to the lonely heart, it is a castle. You think the living room is a mess, but to the person whose life is a mess, your house is a sanctuary. You think the meal is simple, but to those who eat alone every night, pork and beans on paper plates tastes like filet mignon. What is small to you is huge to them. Open your table. (58)

Our Big 5 Year Old!

We were so busy having a fun and exciting birthday celebration day with Kieran, I didn't have a chance to sit down and write this birthday blog in honor of our first born!

Our lives changed so amazingly 5 years ago! Kieran, you have made your mommy and daddy so proud! You have grown into such a handsome boy this past year. I don't even know if I can summarize all the ways you have changed!

Last year after your fishing birthday party, you decided you wanted to have a Scooby-Doo party and you never changed your mind! You can be very indecisive when you are choosing which toy to pick at the Dollar Tree, but when it comes to birthday parties, you make your choice and stick with it!

You are so full of life! You love to show us how fast you can run (from the back door all the way to the couch). This past year, you have slowly started to grow out of some of your "childhood" favorites such as Thomas the Train and Bob the Builder. Those preschool favorites have turned into a passion for superheros, Transformers and, of course, Scooby-Doo. Last year for Halloween, you were a sweet, soft, fluffy panda bear. This year you are planning to be Spiderman! Right now, you are waiting for "your muscles to come in" so that you can become a superhero.

At the beginning of the year, you were a little anxious about growing up, but now you are very excited about being 5. You told me that you were going to start kindergarten the day after your birthday. You may be a little disappointed when you wake up tomorrow morning! One of the things I love about this age is that even though you are excited about being a year older, you are still mommy's little boy. Tonight, you wanted to take a shower (instead of a bath) because that is what 5 year olds do, but then you wanted me to "carry you like a baby" to bed.

Bedtime has become one of my favorite parts of the day with you! We have created a very special ritual. We tell our Scooby-Doo story (yes, a different one every night), say our prayers, sing three songs ("Go to Sleep", "Rock-a-bye-Baby", and "Twinkle, Twinkle"), and then I sleep with you for 5 minutes. If you don't fall asleep during one of those steps, you usually ask me some deep question as I'm walking out the door (Why do people breathe? Why do we need to sleep?). You are a very smart boy!

Speaking of smart, you reached a very exciting milestone this year. You read your first book! I almost cried when you sounded out your first sentence. You really love learning. This year, you decided you wanted to go to "mommy school" and you have held me to it! You love writing your letters and numbers. You are not a big fan of coloring, but you really like puzzles and word games. I pray you always keep this passion for learning new things!

Last, but not least, you are an amazing big brother. Elyse looks up to you so much. She even says she's 5 just like you. You are very protective of her even if you are a little rough sometimes! I love watching the two of you play together or snuggle on the couch watching a movie together.

Yesterday, we were looking at your baby pictures and you asked me why I picked you. Even if I had had the choice, I wouldn't have picked anyone else! You are my sweet baby boy, and I am so thankful that God picked you to be in our family! Happy 5th Bithday, Buddy! We love you!